The ONE Worst Excuse That Sabotages Your Dream!

January 24, 2012

How many things do you BELIEVE in and DO in your life…

“Because everybody else does…?”

If you have teenagers, you’ve probably been given this as an excuse for unfavorable actions.

For example, when our oldest son passed his driving exam, we didn’t know that the first thing he did was pick up his best friend and drive to the mall in the worst possible rainstorm ever. Why? He said, “Because everybody else does it, mom.

Do we as adults use this statement to excuse, motivate, or justify our actions, too?

Growing up in Holland made me a very liberal thinker; you learn that everything is up for discussion and nothing is set in stone. Rules can be bent until both parties agree.

You can imagine that it was quite a culture shock for us to come to America where rules are rules — no offense! (smile)

To put things in perspective, when I was a teenager and ran a red traffic light on my bike, the police officer who pulled me over was gracious enough to work through my actions and not give me a ticket. Would that happen here in America? Hmm… not sure, but maybe!

When the officer stopped me and asked if I was aware that I ran the red light, I said, “Everybody does it… and gosh, I never noticed you were watching me.” He saw my point of view and agreed that it was bad luck and that I probably didn’t deserve a ticket. After all, bikers are sacred material in Holland. He must have thought, “If everybody else does it, why not her?”

Years later when living in America, I learned that in this country rules aren’t negotiable. You don’t argue with the law about your point of view. Nobody does that… Unless you are Dutch and have no clue what everybody else does!

One day after we’d just arrived in the country, we drove our kids to school. On the way to school we passed five stop signs. We were a happy bunch and chatting along the way, totally unaware of the police car right behind us. At every stop sign we ‘kind of slowed down’ and then crossed the road.

When we arrived at the school, a police officer knocked on my window, taking me completely by surprise. He yelled at me, “How dare you ignore five stop signs!” He was furious. For a short moment we thought he was going to handcuff me and transport me straight to jail. I am glad that I didn’t repeat the same answer that I gave to the Dutch officer.

But maybe this was worse. I spoke the stupid words, “I thought that stop signs were optional.”

Honestly, I truly believed that. You can imagine the officer’s face.

We learned our lesson. By now we know that we really must stop at stop signs because rules aren’t optional in America. See the point?

But what’s the point of my running-stop-signs story?

My behavior was wrong, and I should have used commonsense because our lives and other people’s lives are in danger when we run traffic lights. It’s a win—win to stop when we are told to stop in this case. It’s not optional to ignore a stop sign while driving on the road.

When following your Soul’s path, it’s a win—win to keep going on the road to your dreams! Stopping is NOT optional when you follow the voice of your Soul, because you become unstoppable.

For sure, sometimes other people yell at you and tell you to stop because it doesn’t make sense to them. In that case, you really don’t want to stop. You can’t stop and subordinate the voices and rules outside of you because everybody else does…

We all have our own unique path, and that’s very different from what everybody else does…

Do you get the point?

Let me know what your Soul is telling you, and leave me a comment.



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{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Michelle Lopez January 25, 2012 at 11:01 am

I enjoyed this post Saskia! It’s so funny to hear an outsiders’ view on living in America. We grow up being told how “free” we are here, it’s all relative.

I’m ready to follow my souls’ path for the adventure of a lifetime!


2 Debbi January 25, 2012 at 1:59 am

Saskia – Thank you for sharing. You are correct Stopping is not an option.


3 Michelle Griffiths January 24, 2012 at 11:51 pm

Saskia, you’re right! Stopping is not an option. It’s so exciting when we connect with our soul’s purpose and path in life.


4 saskia January 25, 2012 at 1:45 am

Yes it’s such an adventure we have to take!


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